Oxton's Song of Love
by whiterosedying0
Summary: When Lena sleeps with Hana they slowly lose their grip on what is love and what is self medicated list. Constant perspective changes between Lena and Hana.


How did it end up like this? I came in to tear into Hana's hide, but I end up naked in her bed passionately kissing her. I was supposed to be mad at her. Furious in fact, but somehow she got me to forget my anger for now. Every kiss that she ran down my chest made my mind go haywire. Every kiss that she trailed down to my core made me forget about the world. By the time her mouth reached my core all thoughts abandoned me. We made love for hours before we collapsed, and before too long, we were asleep.

My mind was going haywire. I had just slept with Hana. No, correct that...I FUCKED Hana. I just fucking CHEATED on Emily. I felt sick. Slowly, I snuck out of Hana's bed, making damn sure to not wake her. My whole body shook as I got dressed and go the fuck out of her room. I felt like crying, I felt like punching something, I really felt like killing myself. What the hell was I going to do? How am I supposed to look Emily in the eyes? FUCK! There's no hiding it, I'm going to have to confront her and tell her about this.

The worst part is that I liked the sex. I loved how Hana felt. How she tasted. God what am I thinking?! I first need to get Hana out of my head. I quickly get the permissions that I need for a personal jet and immediately set a course for London. All that time images of Hana kept flashing through my mind. The more I thought of her, the more guilty I became. I was crying at some point during the trip. It was pityful bit I just didn't know what to do. It would only be an hour until I arrive. Only an hour until I was in King's Row. Before I had to face Emily.

She reacted the way I expected her to. She was furious, depressed, but worst of all heartbroken. She had yelled, screamed, and tried to beat the hell out of me. I'm not even surprised that she threw me out. I don't know if she'll forgive me but I know that I feel just a little bit less horrible for cheating. I just have to wait out the storm. God I hope that I can fix this, if not...If not, I'll take off the chronal accelerator and just disappear.

/

What the fuck? Lena had just barged into my room mad as hell about something during my stream. She kept yelling as I tried to ignore her and focus on my stream. It got irritating after a bit and I ended the stream early. Her nagging just went on and on and on! So, I just done the first thing I could think of to shut her up a bit and kissed her. Whether she knew that she was the one to pull me back to another kiss. It was just one kiss, then two, five, we were making out on the bed before too long. When she started on my neck I was more than willing to have sex with her.

We ended up having sex for several hours. God did it feel good. Sex with Lucio wasn't as good as this. She made me feel things that I never thought I would have felt. I don't know why I felt so betrayed when I felt her leave the bed. I know that I have most likely ruined her relationship with Emily. Goddamn it I messed up.

As soon as Lena was out of my room I called Emily and told her about what had happened. She laughed it off because she thought I was pulling a weird prank on her. She hung up before I could properly explain myself. When Lena got back, she'd kill me. I was panicking and panicking bad. I found McCree's stash of alcohol and began drinking my sorrows away. In my intoxicated state I came to the conclusion that I needed to kill myself.

I sobered up some time after my poorly attempted suicide attempt to find out that Lena was kicked out of her apartment, that I really did fuck up. She was the first to check on me after I was released, and just as expected, she tried to quite literally kill me. I was wanting her to just so I didn't have to feel the shame. We haven't spoken to each other since.

/

I had a dream that I was intertwined with Hana again. Her soft skin against my own in another night of passion. Her lips moist, her body covered in our combined sweat, and her core ready for more. She looked so beautiful with the dim light that shone off from her porcilin skin. This dream happened every night since Hana was released back into the working world.

It felt so real every night. I would feel her skin; I could still smell her sweet scent. I was falling madly in love with the woman who ruined a perfect relationship with the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I wanted to hate her but the more I hate her the more I fall in love. She was driving me crazy. I wanted her...no, I needed her. She's driving me so goddamn crazy.

/

I was just getting out of the shower when I heard a knock on my door. Wrapping a towel around myself I go and open the door only to have Lena pin me against the wall, her mouth on mine in a desperate kiss. My body reacted despite my mental screaming to stop. Her tongue entered my mouth and all control that I had was now gone. We made our way to my bed and she laid me down, never breaking our kiss. I had to break for air as she stripped down to nothing. The only light was that coming from the small bathroom but that was all that she needed to look like a goddess.

/

This wasn't right, I know this and I still press on. Just seeing her wrapped in that towel of hers and freshly dampened hair was turning me on. She looked terrified but just as excited as well. There was no turning back now.

I slid my hand across her body, feeling her through her dampening towel. The moans she made only further drove my lust. Her towel was gone before she had time to react. Hands ran along skin down further and further until they reached their ultimate destination.

I spread her lips apart and teased her, trying to get her as moist as I could. Her mouth had once again found my own as she began to play with the nib on my breast. I played with her swollen clit as I ease my fingers inside of her.

/

Lena wasn't going easy on me. She was going in straight for the kill. With my other hand I make my way down to make a move of my own. Her body naturally shook violently as I enter her and begin pumping and matching her rythem. I can feel myself coming closer to the edge but I won't give in.

/

We had sex until the sun came up. I have made up my mind, I'm glad that Hana had tore a rift in my life. Something about her drives me more insane than Emily. I don't know if it's because of how many times she's had my back out on the feild or if it was just a momentary brokenhearted lust but I want to be with her. I can easily say that I love her. And from what I can tell without asking is that she loves me just as much, if not more.


End file.
